MARRIED WOMEN SEEKING

Married women: Obsession with the couple

The most characteristic feature of this kind of infatuation is the pathological fear of breaking with the couple and live in solitude

Nervousness, sweating, stomach in knots? These are some of the classic symptoms of being in love, a feeling that most people ever experience throughout his life. Among the most common stresses that it wishes to spend with your loved one as long as possible. But sometimes that desire becomes an uncontrollable obsession. Experts say that love is dependent disease caused by a terrible fear of losing your partner. A fear that affects 10.8% of females and 8.7% of men, claiming to be emotionally dependent. Where is the line between love 'controlled' and 'excessive obsession' for the couple? The infatuation to obsession. Psychologists say that the strong need not to be alone creates such dependence makes it possible to start talking about addiction to love or, rather, an obsession, because they are equivalent. "The increasing dependence of individuals generates dependent lifestyles," said our experts. For its part, the psychiatrist and clinical investigator of the Fundación Instituto Spit, says the obsession, addiction to love "does not exist", as "notes" "quantitatively is impossible to have a disease of addiction to love it want a lot is not an addiction, it can be an act of heroism or the most wonderful thing that can happen to humans, but want very much, love too, there, want too much is unloved. " The expert considers to be addicted to love or lack of love means more than having an addictive behavior toward another person, a malvivencia of love. "When a person becomes obsessed, he settled in a relationship or live depressive stormy love, is not due to love or to another person. The cause lies in a number of underlying factors for the patient," he insists.

"We can understand what is an experience of obsession or addiction to love remembering our relationships passionate stage the same way that the experience of drunkenness. It is an experience that has had a lot of people but only a minority suffering from alcoholism - study continues. The love addict is installed in the stage of passion, perpetuating indefinitely so anxious and immature.
The love addict is installed in the stage of passion, perpetuating indefinitely so anxious and immature behave within the relationship as you would an addict on drugs. " All these findings were exposed in January during the celebration of the First Professional Meeting on Sentimental Units: Unit affective or emotional, love addiction, codependency and Bidependencia, organized by the Fundación Instituto Spil. The symposium took several experts showed how emotional the clerk is usually unaware of their problem as well as denial and self-delusion, no information channels to explain what happens. "There is a popular understanding of this problem. People know what is happening and also the professional, is the worst ignorance. The worst is self-deception that the subject does not recognize their own problem and ignore what say, "says. Many sites offer free online dating personals for adult single men girls and women seeking a wedding, but also men looking for single ladies and married or divorced wives for a date through singles personals.

"Love turns into obsession when the other person occupies the most important and almost unique in the scale of priorities of the subject," says a psychologist and author of "Emotional Dependency." "Something very striking about these people, who may also be indicative of the addictive component in the relationship, is the need for constant access to your partner emotionally dependent, trying to do all sorts of activities with the other person, calling continuously and controlling through mobile messages, which is interpreted as an act of verifying that the couple "is still there ', and together with an imaginary umbilical cord, qualifies. You could say that the dependent and subordinate cancel both your partner only have eyes for someone else, "trying to please her continuously for the large overestimation of carrying it out," describes. This means a matching love addiction emotional dependence, a new addiction without substance, according to the psychologist, who leads the sufferer to feel, even "abstinence syndrome in the absence of a partner and a need overriding the other at all costs, "says.

More dependent Women are more dependent on men, recognizes a social psychology professor at the University of Oviedo, who says that love sometimes leads to emotional dependency or sentimental, and that this disease suffers from an average of 10 % of the population, mostly women. "Specifically, 10.8% of females and 8.7% of men are emotionally dependent," he stresses. Bump, however, be them (64%) who use the Internet more to find a mate, at a rate nearly twice that of women (34%), as shown by the study by Nielsen / / NetRatings. In addition, 78% of Internet enthusiasts are over 21 years and 66% are between 21 and 49 years. "Interestingly, the study shows that 35% of these visitors with children between 2 and 17 years and 57% live in households of three or four members," say the authors of the research.

Fear of Loneliness

The very dependents live for love. According to experts, "live by and for an obsession fixative, because it ensures that it is an obsession in which the other has role as an obsessed person does not love the other or the other but to an image, a sublimation of the other's image. "It's a pseudoidealización, is obsessive, intolerant, accompanied by feelings of being trapped and bound in the relationship and at the same time, catch them on the other. It is what is known as addiction pathological or pathological attachment, he says. According to experts consulted here, this addiction occurs primarily in women who have a strong emotional dependence. This addiction occurs primarily in women who have a strong emotional dependence "The addict or addicted to love," stated the psychiatrist falls in love with one and another person, but not close relationships.'s In love or love of all couples. Going from flower to flower, and the person falls in love and failed in all relationships. It is a relational and this failure makes repeat similar behavior with successive couples without getting to know the other person. project into the other person what they want, but basically unknown to the person you believe to be in love " .

The most characteristic feature of this type of love or love is their fear of being alone and the deep pain that the break with your partner, to the point of being, "branded on the pain of loss." "The fear of loss, loneliness is something that is not supported. Live as subject to the projection of the image that are able to keep her humble, to surrender to another person, pick up the phone and call constantly "details. The psychologists also confirm the "great terror" that people feel dependent, on par with low self-esteem and a strong emotional need, which is forcing them to seek a partner that meets this need. Confirms that it is very submissive people, who are continually seeking to please their partners and always have the feeling that the relationship may break. "They are very insecure in the maintenance of it, because the emotional need of the other person is great. In addition, when they have a relationship obsession focuses on the former partner, which may continue to bombard with messages, called or even sexual encounters, or are obsessed by another person who understand could be a good candidate, " may refer to a situation in which the dependent person tends to have a preference for selfish couples, distinct, very confident and even hostile. "Ultimately, people who soar to be considered very different from the rest and that is precisely the opposite of what they are themselves," he says. For this expert happiness exists only in the early stages of the relationship, when there is a process of euphoria, the couple brings out the best of itself. However, he stressed that this situation "is very short" and that the imbalance between the dependent and her partner generates a large deterioration. "However, what he fears most is that the dependent decay, but the break for bad that is the relationship," he insists.

Women are seeking common features

The profile you share those with an obsession or addiction to love are:

* Need over the approval of others and be liked.
* They feel low self esteem, because they have been unsatisfactory emotional relationships throughout his life.
* Place the pair in the first place in his life, with a lot of difference.
* Fantasize illusions and is greatly at the beginning of a relationship or with the appearance of a person they think interesting.
* They tend to take subordinate positions in relationships.
* The break them is a real trauma, but their desire for a relationship are such great looking early to another person.
* They are not always selective because they have a partner urges.
* Looking for a dominant position in the pair.

"Anyone who meets these symptoms should see a mental health professional for psychotherapy, which should start analyzing the current situation: for example, if the dependent is in a very unbalanced and unhealthy, think on balance it, if possible, or even prescribe a break. The best way to work with these people is when they are no spouse, to slowly regain their self-help of our work: the great object is this and establish a pattern of balance in their future relationships, in which instead of idealizing and submit to another have the emotional need that we all have, "

Women are at greater risk of Internet addiction than men, according to a psychiatric study

It is estimated that 6% of users performed a pathological use of the Network. The profile of Internet addict is a woman between 19 and 26 years with a high educational level and that spends more than 30 hours a week connected to the network, mainly to chat or play, according to a study by Spanish psychiatrists published in the journal Farmax. " In Europe there are about 9 million Internet users, of which more than 6 per cent make a pathological use of the Web This percentage could be higher than those under the age of 14, which are not included in the figure users, according to the study. Similarly, those affected by Internet addiction syndrome usually have time network connection abnormally high, are isolated from their environment and ignore their obligations as well as family labor, the report warns.

On the other hand, points out that there are three main types of Internet addicts: those who are interested in their computer and surf for hours to find programs and incorporate them into your computer, those who take advantage of switching times to interact with other Internet users, and those who already have gambling and use the Web as a means to play. The usual profile is for women of 19-26 years with a high educational level, married or single, but not divorced or separated, which connect more than 30 hours per week. They often suffer from a decline in their self-esteem and are particularly attracted to the games. Moreover, in many cases already have other addictions, like alcohol or gambling.

What exactly do we mean when we refer to human sexuality play?

As in any voluntary act that looks fun, every step of the sexual game is a game itself, since it starts until it ends. Each stage has its meaning, and live and enjoy without either party is considered more or less or important. This is how we understand the sexual game. A kiss, a hug, intercourse, caresses ... and so many ways of finding pleasure in sexual games are in themselves. So wrong sexual practices have been divided into complete and preliminary. The importance of the first against the devaluation of the latter but does not lose the enjoyment of the game towards a goal that may or may not arrive, and may or may not sought.

We call sex play because it involves some playful relationship. The adult decides to give ground to the more sincere and less influenced by maturity, in most children. This is rid of prejudice, being outside corseted myths and taboos and prohibitive, and get to play for the pleasure of play, giving way to curiosity, exploration, imagination and passion. It's about learning about oneself, to know more and develop the potential of a sexual encounter where they are present cooperation and joy. It abandons the requirement to learn, and the mask that forces appear to control and, ultimately, namely arrive and leave more personality girl. The power and arrogance here do not work, for pleasure implies freedom granted to procure oneself and another, promote laughter and seriousness away. This is great, knowing that the satisfaction of the game does not depend on the love and skill, but to allow a code that keeps us self-control.

Unable to find safety in the workplace, women seeking husbands

Over the past two decades, professional women in Japan have sought to advance their careers and prioritize personal success instead of the traditional domestic life. But as the major corporations instituting wage cuts and layoffs, self-sufficiency has become less viable for Japanese women. Now, a growing wave of "hunting" husbands "are putting aside their professional ambitions and devoted himself entirely to find a man and get married. A shrine that supposedly delivers good luck to the game-husband has received 20% more visitors in the past year, and ironically many women are spending large sums of money in amulets, prayers and dating services. As one woman told Bloomberg, "is a reasonable investment." The energy that women are devoting to the marriage marks a dramatic change in a country that only a few months before was instituting policies to increase the birth rate.

Meanwhile, U.S. industry online dating is thriving. Those who are unemployed are significantly more time to find love. And while Japanese women are committing to the "investment" extra, men and women of America have discovered that seek online dating is cheaper than going out with several prospects in real life. Experts suggest that these people are not trying to live someone else's money, but in these difficult times, singles (as) American (as) are seeking emotional support, not financial. England has also seen an increase in the rate of marriage. The churches and registry offices have had a significant increase in the number of people planning weddings for next year. The spokesperson of the Westminster register office told the British newspaper The Daily Telegraph he attributed the increase in the rate of marriage to the credit crisis. Professor Cary Cooper, a social scientist at the University of Lancaster, expressed a similar view to that of U.S. experts. Cooper told the Daily Telegraph that during times of affluence, people have a more selfish. But when they disappear the hopes of immediate wealth and personal advancement, people want the assurance of a relationship

Background: Marriage and babies unpopular in Japan

In November 2008, Japanese companies had to persuade their employees to have more babies in an effort to combat the decline in birth rate. At that time, Japanese women seemed less interested in explicit form families and significantly oriented their careers. The women expressed their frustration at the prospect of serving both her husband and their children, preferring instead to concentrate on themselves. The statistics showed that more women were leaving aside the marriage, arguing that men need to be cared for, and preferred to take care of themselves. Related topic: Recession forces couples to stay together. Even when a relationship seems to be emotionally stable, recession means that couples often can not afford the high price of divorce. According to an article in the New York Daily News, people are deciding to stay in a relationship because it is too expensive to hire a lawyer or maintaining separate residences. Separated couples are seeking cheaper alternatives, such as living in separate bedrooms, visit a marriage counselor or just make a greater effort to make their marriage work than you would in a better economy. 

Women prefer to marry, they do not

It is not news that men and women are very different in their behavior, tastes and many other things. Man putting the alliance in a woman's finger. Safety is an important issue for women. But according to a team of scientists from the mental health of both sexes not only depends on different factors, but these factors seem to be in this case, diametrically opposed. Men who marry are more vulnerable to mental illness than those who just live together with their partners, say the researchers from Queen Mary University in London, UK. The study published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, also suggests that those who remain unmarried are those that carry less risk of depression. The healthier the whole spectrum of possible combinations are the men and women who continue with their first partner. And the risk increases for our mental health if the couple separates. A series of breaks (with several different partners) has the same effect. However in this situation, women seem more vulnerable than men.

The study indicates that women "make more use of disposable tissues when they separate, whereas men recover faster. In fact, they manage quite well without a man next door. With or without? Those who have never maintained a relationship, scientists say, are those that are safer to suffer mental problems (although for many, not to build a couple is a sign that something is wrong). However, once inside the relationship, women seem to be more happy with a covenant on the finger. They are the ones who have babies and therefore have a strong protective instinct. That is one reason why marriage is perhaps the most important , a specialist in relationships. Instead women living with a man but "without papers", do not seem so happy. The researchers believe in this case, your unhappiness is related to the fact that they have fewer rights (and therefore less safe) than married women. According to Paul Hall, a specialist in relationships, the study shows that women and men have different needs. "For the female security is more important." "They are the ones who have babies and therefore have a strong protective instinct. That's one reason why marriage is perhaps the most important." "But these are all hypotheses," said Hall, "a study published last year suggested that men and women are happier if they marry."